WI THE FI CAN’T I?

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Hello my darlings,

You know, there used to be a time when men were men. They’d do the heavy lifting and we’d make sure a red sock went nowhere near the white wash.

It’s come to my attention that women these days want a man who’s a dork. A nerd! A guy with razor rash. A guy with a bad haircut (if he has hair at all). Why? Well, it’s all that computernerdie Zuckergeek’s fault. There’s even a new name for this type of man – a technosexual! Who knew?

Not long ago we lusted after men in well fitted jeans, who wore tool belts hung like gunslingers and knew what to do with a spanner. ย Then there were men like David Hasselhoff, remember him?

imgres-1I think it was the swimming trunks.

Then we went through the metrosexuals like The Gandy or James Bond – men who waxed, have a perfectly sculptured torso and had Ozwald Boetang’s cell number on speed dial. (Savile Row tailor).

Times, girls, have changed. And I must admit that we’ve felt that change in this house. Many moons ago, the break down of domestic chores went like this: I did the cleaning, cooking, gardening, grocery shopping, painting and decorating, looking after the children, organising after school activities, remembering the birthdays of every single relative. H, on the other hand, was chief recycler, anything to do with the cars, man who could pull the cord of the petrol lawnmower, and the man who intimidated teachers at parent’s evening. And main breadwinner. And it worked!

But now technology has come along to ‘make life easier.’ *Snort* Now, I can’t function if my computer/laptop/ipadmini goes down. And what’s with the TV remotes? Eh? With all those bloody trackers and menus how the hell are we supposed to work those? I have to get my son to show me the right button to get the news, again!

Now my repartee with H go like this:

Me: ‘Why won’t Gmail work?’

H: ‘Have you rebooted?’

Me: With an eye roll he can’t see. ‘Yep.’

H: ‘Reboot.’

Me: ‘Is the WiFi down?’

H: Deep sigh. ‘Let me check.’

Me: Screeching like an evil witch. ย ‘Now I have no signal!!!!!’

H: ‘For God’s sake woman, give it five minutes!’

And so it goes back and forth until I’m spitting nails at the Mac and showing big sharp teeth at anyone who crosses my path. It isn’t pretty. Of course, the smart thing to do would be to go down into the belly of the beast that lives in H’s study and work the WiFi myself. But I’m banned from the room because, ‘You cause chaos.’ And he’s right – he’s the techie, geeky guy (without razor rash) and I wouldn’t have it any other way. Men, girls, are genetically programmed to deal with this stuff, just like dealing with the trash!

I sincerely believe the basis of a good marriage, especially when life is full on, is to stick to what we’re good at.

So, do you have highly defined roles in your relationship?

Do you put out the trash or does he make fabulous lemon meringues?

You know I adore hearing from you guys!

Christine XXX

26 thoughts on “WI THE FI CAN’T I?

  1. We have a mostly non-traditional situation in our house. I have a masters degree, he went to one year of college. We’ve been married almost 22 years, and he has been a stay-at-home dad for 12 of those. He’s a great cook, but not much of a housekeeper. I do laundry, ironing, dusting and vacuuming, while he takes care of the cars, the yard, and home maintenance. Interestingly, while I manage 20+ databases at work, and provide technical assistance to 8 states, my hubby is the true techie in our house. He builds the desktop oc’s, sets up the wifi network, and does all the networking stuff with the TV’s, blue ray players, etc. I am perfectly capable of doing those things-I just don’t do them at home. Odd, huh?

  2. We definitely have roles and when I started writing two years ago, Danny would stare at me then walk over to the empty fridge then walk back and stare.
    He puts out the trash, but neither he nor I have yet to make lemon meringue!
    I used to have a terrible time with the internet when I worked in the kitchen or sunroom. I since moved into a little room above Danny’s study and the signal is STRONG!!

  3. I’d love to hear some audio of the “screeching like an evil witch.” Any chance of a Podcast? ๐Ÿ˜‰
    If I could hear H shouting “For God’s sake, woman!” I’d have a ringtone for life!
    LOL
    We have a pretty good division of labor in my house. I am the spider-killing, refuse managing, lawn mowing, heaving lifting, ladder climbing, drill and hammer wielder of the house. I also take great pride in my ability to stare other men in the eye until they cower like apologetic noodle-spined, Hasselhoff fans for looking at my wife for more than three seconds. But secretly, I can’t blame them. She’s pretty “Hawt” (if I can steal that word from our mutual friend).
    After Amy’s twelve years of college (no, not an exaggeration!), and moving to the job-killing capital of the world (upstate New York), I’ve also added chef, butler, and house elf to my resume.
    I, too, cringe when she uses any technology more advanced than a spiral notebook, but I think she just plays up her incompatibility with anything released in the previous five years. And I don’t mind. ๐Ÿ˜‰

  4. Love this blog, Christine! I write, do the housework, take care of the kids and all things kid related. He works, pays bills (he wouldn’t let me near them–I tried), and does all things technology. He gets mad when I have an issue and he doesn’t have time to address it and asks why I can’t fix it myself. Then I remind him he’s told me not to touch anything. It’s his own catch 22. I keep suggesting we get outside help, and it’s as if I’ve questioned his manhood. Go figure…

  5. Let us say that there are words the Editress uses only when technology is involved. Anyway, roles are what make a relationship work. We are conventional couple. I disgorge, she grammaritizes (or something). I tidy the lawn, she makes the muffins. In emergent combat, she would watch her area of responsibility, knowing what that is and what to do about a problem she sees there. You knowโ€”all the usual stuff.

  6. If we hadn’t spawned three offspring together, we would probably be a two-income power couple. I brought most of the power tools to the marriage with all things related to landscaping and construction, while hubby changes his own oil (I never had a thing for car engines). Our yard suffers from benevolent neglect and I’ll carry out the small spiders, but make HIM carry out the really big ones. He’s more of your Bill Gates computer nerd (he’s an MIT-educated computer electrical engineer) and my answer to anything electronics-related is ‘go ask your father.’ I do most of the food prep, but he usually makes breakfast and flips a mean pancake (mostly because -my- answer to breakfast is ‘go pour yourself a bowl of cereal’). I run the kids around to appointments/activities. What’s really funny is that the kids know if they do something stupid (like … don’t run with your shoes untied … you’ll fall) and get hurt, they run to DADDY for sympathy, but when the big nasty dog up the street comes and barks at them, they run and hide behind ME. Perhaps its all those martial arts belts I’ve wracked up?

  7. We do have a few defined rolls in our household, but for the most part, we each do a little bit of everything. Except I don’t wash vehicles or mow lawn and hubby doesn’t do the techno stuff, he leave it for me.

    No Wi-fi … OMG, that’s a disaster!

  8. Thank God for our sons! I just bought a new iphone and their walking me through it. Funny thing. In the past, and you know we go back a long way, hubby wasn’t the techie man around the house. I always hooked up the stereo equipment and TVs. But now, he is the computer go to guy. Well, he’s home alot now. LOL! But don’t even talk to me about routers. Mine died last week. It was chaos! And of late, he is so excited to be able to take out the trash. Poor man is going stir crazy! He is great in the kitchen. Cooks, cleans, does the dishes. Not much bending there. LIttle by little, things are getting back to some normalcy. As that happens, it does give me more time to write. He’s very supportive about that. I’m the one that has a hard time letting things go. I love a clean house. So guess who cleans the toilets around here. I see vacumning in his future. ๐Ÿ™‚

    P.S. How’s that new car? What did you get? I know, a Ferrari!

    • Haha! No, not a Ferrari!

      We can’t be anal when we work together, she says. I’m so pleased things are getting back to normalcy for you and Bill. Give him a hug from me. And how wonderful are your sons???

      Lovely to hear from you, Karen!

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